“It’s better to be kind than to be right.” Gautama Buddha

By J. Irving

Tactical Officers, better known as Tac-O, in the Philippine Military Academy are like the drill masters of the Marines, but without constant shouting. They have sharp eyes to look for offences. Report those defects, under the name of discipline. But there is one soul that I wish to tell you who is different . . .

He was Rear Admiral (RADM) JOSE ALBERTO “JAY” VELASCO ‘72 of the Philippine Navy (the picture shown above is my memory of him when I was a cadet, taken from the Sword, the graduation book of class ‘77). He touched so many lives, not only in the academy but throughout his career. He was so loved by people around him.

The Admiral was a Lieutenant Junior Grade (LTJG) when Class ‘80 were plebes at PMA (school year: 1976-1977). He was the Tac-O of Bud-Daho (Delta). Plebes fondly called him “BONDYING” behind his back. The monicker was taken from a popular Tagalog comics character during that time. He was humorous, always pepping plebes up and making them relax. The opposite of a typical Tac-O, who are usually strict and enjoy making our lives difficult.

One time, as Officer-in-Charge (OC), during our yearling year, he entered our room and ask my roommates why cadets are required to wear neckties during study period? He said: “So that it is easier for us to hang ourselves, if we no longer comprehend what we are studying, afraid to fail our exams and get dismissed.” haha

Another time, he asked us what is the first thing we ever do upon waking up in the morning? My roommates said: to iron our uniforms, polish our metal parts, shine our shoes, go to the bathroom … he was smiling when he gave us his answer, “The first thing you have to do is open your eyes! That’s my advice” haha

So sad to say, he passed away at 4:05 in the morning this July 13, 2025, last Sunday, at the age of 75 years old.

A flashback occurred when I read the news from the class Secretary on that day, as posted in our Viber group, about his demise, telling us that our favourite Tac-O is gone …

In December 1976, as acting Tac-O of Bessang (Alfa), he allowed me to go to Manila to let me send off my mother and siblings leaving for Canada to migrate (I was already a newly recognized plebe, so I decided to stay behind; if not yet recognized, I would have joined my family without thinking hehe). As you know, plebes are prohibited to go outside the academy while plebes. However, in his marginal note to the Commandant he wrote, “This might be the last time the Fourth Classman might see his family!” 

Thinking about it, on what he wrote, during the eve of fighting in Pata (12 February 1981, where 118 of my companions in the 31st Infantry Battalion were massacred on that morning with our battalion commander and staff by the joint forces of the MNLF, SPMF and CAFGUs of the island). Bracing for another attack, I wrote a very long letter to my mother (who did not come for my graduation) with flashlight, hiding inside poncho, in case I get killed . . . only then, I understood what he meant and the note he wrote might come true.

I told him about this incident, on his Facebook page, when I greeted him a Happy Birthday, as a retired officer and a grandfather. In one of the comments, a class ‘78 also delivered a testimony that the admiral caught him drinking during taps with mistahs. After staring at them while standing in attention, he suddenly blurted out: SCRAM! The firsties were all afraid to get the report for drinking – a grave justification for separation. The report never came. The person telling the story had a good run in his military career, raking three stars. He asked Sir Jay, “Why did you not report us Sir?”

Sir Jay, replied: “It is better to be kind than to be right.”

In behalf of the people you touched, Thank you Sir Jay and may flights of angels escort you to paradise …